I used to walk through the charming streets of Brooklyn to local midwife offices, often on the ground floors of brownstones. It was my dream idea of a prenatal visit and I figured, why not get to know the midwives now, before I get pregnant (so I won’t have to scramble and find someone later)?
I went to them for my regular check-ups, but mostly for a connection and a peak into that world of womanhood and birth. Perhaps their natural touch might kick in my fertility? Perhaps they knew something I didn’t know?
The midwives were wise women, for sure.
Educated in miracles.
They seemed to know all about the power of a woman; the sacredness of childbirth.
It turns out those appointments were as close to childbirth as I got, as I never did get pregnant.
But I’ll never forget one of those visits.
This woman knew what to ask me, as a wise one would.
She asked if I was happy in my relationship.
I told her a tidbit or two. Right there behind closed doors with women and pregnant bellies in the waiting room.
And she looked at me woman to woman, and boldly said please no – don’t continue the path to get pregnant. If you are in a toxic environment, take care of that first. I sensed she was telling me to run. I sensed she could see right through me.
Sometimes you need that look from another.
Sometimes you need someone to make your spine chill, no matter how hard it is to hear.
It usually leads to rethinking things. It often leads to seeing yourself differently. It often gives birth to a new voice in your head that says it’s time for something to change.
Love to all,
Dear women, are you in a toxic relationship? If so, maybe you wish someone knew that? If you don’t have someone telling you this already, I will tell you – that you are worthy of kindness and love; you are worthy of a good partner. Know that healing your soul is possible, no matter how deep you’re in it.
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