Love Story: Still Day 1 of Danny & Mara


Well, I’ve loved your emails.   So fun!
I am in a huge rush and I must go, so I can’t write much.
But let me just say *thank you* and that your emails made my day, too.

I love all you said about God/charity/unconditional love.  Oh, I hear you on all of that.. I know it all first hand now.  I chose to do the same thing you did.  I think it’s the hardest thing we ever have to do as humans…to offer that love to others in the worst moments… but I was so spiritually empowered that I was able to do it.  It was like a gift from God.  This last year, I have never felt so close to heaven.  Oh man, it was amazing.  And still is.

And YES – – I am for sure more open.   I shock people sometimes, I think.  But I feel it’s better to be open & to share.  I’ve learned to feel so comfortable and happy with myself and feel I don’t need to be anything that I’m not.   It’s such a good feeling.  So thank you for being the same way!   I love this.  No filters needed, thank you very much !

OK, so much more to say… but I must dash.  Darn.

But let’s do stay in touch.  I normally would not do this kind of thing.   But in this case, I want to. 🙂

Have a wonderful night!  And do say hello to Ashley.   She is a doll to think of us both and try to set up two good people.



{And, after checking my email several times over the next twenty minutes :), I received this response from Danny…ahhhhhh……I already was going NUTS over him. }



You’re welcome :).

You mentioned being spiritually empowered…I often wonder if the reason I (we) felt that way is exactly because we chose the path we did.  Making that first choice to face the burden with kindness/love/forgiveness seems to me to be the moment that I first felt that power.  After that, there just didn’t seem to be room for or a need for bitterness and anger.  You probably hear people all the time say they wouldn’t be able to do it…but for me it seemed like there was no other way.  Truly though the strength was not our own, a gift from God indeed.


Okay, time for me to go as well.   I look forward to more chats though.  I’m especially delighted to find that we’ve shared so many of the same experiences (by that I mean the good things that have happened since)!  I’m extra curious to find what other life conclusions you’ve come to and how you arrived there.

Again, thank you for putting a BIG FAT SMILE on my face, renewing my hope, and reminding me that good things await.  I’m glad you first lacked a filter and extended an open hand.

Enjoy the rest of your night!


Photos by the lovely Saydi Eyre Shumway, of Boston.

Dear Readers:  A lot of people ask me how I get my hair like that.  I’ll post on it, soon. 🙂   For now, here is one of my favorite hair colorists in NYC.  She is the owner of The Whittemore House and she’s amazing.  And, for all you hair junkies, you can watch her do her thing in this little video. )

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  1. Sara Borg October 6, 2011 at 7:08 am - Reply

    Is it ridiculous that I check this thing multiple times a day?

    What are you doing up so late missy? 😉

    Just watched the video and I have to say Victoria is a rock star! Isn't this where Aubrey Nelson worked when she lived in NYC?

  2. Mara Kofoed October 6, 2011 at 3:57 pm - Reply

    Sara! Thank you so much for reading! I'll admit, I am over here checking for comments & emails multiple times a day :). Haha. It's so fun to hear from everyone. So yes, Victoria is at the salon where Aubrey used to work. I have had Aubrey color my hair there, too, and she is AMAZING!!! I wish so much that she still worked in NYC.

  3. Amanda Blair October 6, 2011 at 4:08 pm - Reply

    Hey! I go to Whittemore house! Reagan is my stylist…do you know her?

    Gah, you guys are cute! You give me more faith, that after I'm done healing myself and finding peace within myself, the love I've been looking for my whole life will come find me!

  4. Mara Kofoed October 6, 2011 at 4:21 pm - Reply

    Amanda – thank you, dear! I don't know Reagan personally, but I LOVE her Hairdresser on Fire blog!

    And oh my, Amanda, I can't tell you how excited I am for you to heal/find peace…once you get there…you'll be irresistable to all the good guys and also strong enough to pass up on the bad ones. The key for me was learning to be at peace WITH OR WITHOUT A HUSBAND (& WITH OR WITHOUT A BABY, TOO.) There is nothing more empowering than that kind of peace. More posts on this topic coming ! 🙂

  5. Annelise October 6, 2011 at 5:38 pm - Reply

    Yes Mara your hair is so pretty! I am laughing at the button up collared shirts that Danny just loves because that is SUCH a Danny shirt. I remember him showing me his shirt and telling me that his mom tailors all of his shirts so that they are the perfect length. Let's hope that you have become a great seamstress 🙂 Your relationship with your spouse is the most important thing!!! Well, next to Heavenly Father. But a lot of people forget that after they have kids. They end up spending more time on their relationship with their kids than their spouse. I have to remind myself that my relationship with Brian comes before my kids so this blog is a good reminder.

  6. danny October 6, 2011 at 7:09 pm - Reply

    Annelise, that's pretty funny that you remember that about my mom helping tailor a shirt! I think she only did it on one or two…but I wanted her to do it to them all :).

    Fortunately, now that I'm on the east coast, there are way more stores that cater to a slim fit look…so further tailoring needed…good for me and good for Mara.

  7. danny October 6, 2011 at 7:39 pm - Reply

    Amanda – I couldn't agree more with what both you and Mara wrote. Work on becoming your very best self, independent of another, and especially independent of a good or bad circumstances. When you do that, when you consciously choose to embrace the better virtues in life (Faith Hope and Love), and purposefully put aside emotions and thoughts based on Fear Doubt and Anger…and try to do that in every relationship that you have, and every day to day circumstance you come across…you cannot help but be transformed from the inside out.

    And when that transformation happens in yourself, it becomes easier to recognize if it has happened in someone else. Mara and I have talked a lot about the emails that we were writing in those first couple of weeks and throughout the subsequent courtship. We were both kind of testing each other to see if the other truly understood the principles that had changed our lives for the better. I would throw out a small mention of something that I had learned to be the essence of a happy life to see if she had learned it also and could speak to it. She'd do the same with me. Because I had become whole before I met her, I was able to tell that she was whole also, and vice versa.

    So yes, continue on your journey to be your best self. Becoming your best self will help you see others more clearly, so you can find others who are seeking to be their best self. You will be drawn to them, and they to you – even if it needs to happen across state lines 🙂

  8. Shiloh October 6, 2011 at 10:21 pm - Reply

    I am loving the blog posts, the story, the lessons. I am completely inspired and moving to action. Thanks.

    PS I am anxiously awaiting to see your hair secrets. Best hair ever. Seriously. I have hair envy every time I see you:)

  9. Beth Skillman October 8, 2011 at 4:15 pm - Reply

    Danny – I really like what you are saying about seeing others more clearly when you are whole. It's a lightbulb moment for me in understanding why I'm being drawn to some people and feeling the need to have some space from others. Good stuff.

  10. Jennifer November 18, 2011 at 1:29 am - Reply

    Awwww I am terribly in love with your love stor, gosh this should be a novel or a movie. THIS is the real kind of love. And there is something magical and romantic of the exchange of email letters, well not exactly letters, but moderate kind of love letters. Your blog in general is such an inspiration! Love Jenny, Feel free to check out my blog, I write a lot about how Gods Gifts, unconditional love, and how love can be known in the unseen, how love is a treasure in a road that were on with many obstacles that make us stronger. Love is unconditionally the most magical amazing strongest possession one can ever hold. My blog is

  11. Noelle April 20, 2012 at 7:56 pm - Reply

    Just found your blog and am loving these letters! So sweet, and so raw. Any random reader can see that you guys definitely had a connection from the start. I love the thought of you two with huge smiles on your faces checking your phones every few minutes.

    Small world Mormon type connection – I clicked over to your friends blog that set you two up – only to see pictures of a different Harris family I know! Megan & Nathan Harris – I'm guessing your girlfriend's brother-in-law? I used to babysit for them when I lived in California. Small world.

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